Conveying unexpected news is never easy, and it's natural to feel uncertain going into it. The world of DNA testing and surprise DNA discoveries has made ‘breaking the news’ a new part of life for many people.

Today’s guest blogger shares the emotional journey he experienced learning at age 68 that he had a daughter of whom he was previously unaware. He is nearing the first anniversary of getting the DNA confirmation of his paternity and is looking forward to a visit with his daughter and her family over Thanksgiving. It will be the fourth time he and his daughter will have a chance to meet up in person. 

Imagine sitting in a restaurant waiting for your dinner date to arrive and finding out from your iPhone that half of your family is not what you expected. Then heading to the bathroom to call Ancestry and ask, "Could this be wrong?"

You donated sperm, eggs, or embryos in the past and have begun to hear the news stories that home DNA tests have done away with the promise of anonymity you were once guaranteed. Here are a few tips for you that I’ve compiled, after working with families and individuals involved in surprise discoveries from DNA testing.

I've gotten some questions about how to approach an unexpected DNA match and try to open up the lines for communication. I've posted some draft language here for you to get a sense of what I've written or advised other people to write in the past.

Severance Magazine is a resource for the growing group of individuals who learn they have been separated by biological relatives.

ROH is very tricky topic but one we need to get comfortable talking about. It can happen to anyone of any age from any background.

When Maggy was 54 years old, she discovered that her father wasn’t who she thought he was.

You order a $99 home DNA test for some holiday pleasure. It’s a bit of fun. Right? Until it turns your life upside down.

The news of just how many people receive surprises about their family matching from DNA tests is spreading.

The recorded re-telling of a painful and emotional experience of uncovering a DNA surprise is helpful for others to read. It supports and validates others who are going through the same thing, and it provides insight for the friends, family, and professionals who will be there alongside a person on their journey following the unexpected discovery.

The uncovering of one DNA surprise can sometimes have a domino effect in a family. In the case of James and his family, the discovery that the father who raised James wasn’t his biological father led to the same discovery for his three siblings as well.

Stacey reached out to me looking to connect with and find support from others who have discovered from DNA testing that they have Misattributed Parentage (NPE).

Tracing individuals based on their relatives DNA and family trees are only part of what GEDmatch allows DNA researchers to do. Other tools are available on GEDmatch, including one called "Are Your Parents Related?"

If you are in a spot of deciding whether to reach out to genetic family who may or may not be aware of your existence, consider the situation pressing, but not urgent.